There is a green hill far away...

I'm having a rough day. Prepare yourself for some venting. I'm surrounded by four kids 5 and under. I don't really have someone here to talk to. :) Since I was in high school I yearned to find a green hill like the one above. A place where I could just lay down on my back, watch the white fluffy clouds pass and ponder. And I don't know if my siblings remember, but at family home evenings when we were little, my favorite song was, "There is a Green Hill Far Away." I remember when it was my turn to pick out the song, everybody else would groan, because that's the one I would always pick. Today, I'm wanting to find a green hill and just be by myself. Is that selfish? I have a lot on my plate right now and my arms are getting tired. :) Josh has been gone for two weeks and we have one week to go. This has proven to be a challenge for me. Josh gone, four small kids, a house for sale and all the other small things like a grouchy neighbor, rain almost everyday (this two bedroom house is getting awfully cramped), can't sleep at night (so i'm tired all day), aaaaaand Eli. I feel like I'm starting to shut down. I try to remember my previous post and have faith that this trial is good for me, but enough is enough. :) I think I have enough experience to last me for a while, don't ya think?